The Key to Knowing How You’re Really Doing with Your Relationship with God

When it comes to improving your relationship with God it’s important to know the truth about how you’re doing.

Often we are so hard on ourselves when it comes to any kind of growth or goals. We get into this all-or-nothing mentality and it doesn’t serve us well in the end. And I’m pretty sure that you are not doing absolutely nothing at all. So you’re probably doing better than you think you are. 

I want to help you create a quiet time plan and routine that is going to actually help you grow closer to God because you’re going to use them and stick to them. As I said before, you probably are not doing as bad as you think you are when it comes to your spiritual growth. 

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Today I want to look at this idea of how you can have a realistic picture of where you are because this is going to be the key to crafting a plan that works. One that you can stick to that. Not just for a day or two or a week or two, and then find yourself at the end of the year going, man, I didn’t accomplish anything. 

I am so guilty of this too. I set sky-high goals for myself every year and I never cross them all off my list.  Studying all the books of the New Testament that Paul wrote has been on my list for three years. Three years. Guess what? I’m still in Romans. I’m still in the very first book that I wanted to study after three years. 

Can you believe it? I’m struggling. And years ago, I spent nine months studying one Psalm. It was a hard time and things were just busy and crazy, and I had little ones, and so I had to go really slow. But I got so much out of Psalm 23. 

So why am I telling you all of this? Well, partly because I don’t want you to think that I have it all together all the time. That is not true. I am all about real talk and being honest with you guys. I struggle too. I mean, seriously, it’s three years and I’m still in Romans! 

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I’m not even far into the book. I’m on chapter two of the book after three years, okay? So I’m right there with you on so much of this. But I want you to know that it is possible to grow closer to God, to study the bible regularly, to go to God in prayer regularly, and to do all of these things, even when you’re struggling.

Even if you don’t think that you’re doing well. When spent nine months on seven verses, I kept telling myself that I was struggling and failing. Why was I taking so long to study this short passage? This is ridiculous. I should be able to be through this in a day, but I wasn’t. And that’s okay. 

Little by little, a little becomes a lot. That is your motto. You’re going to take baby steps toward the direction that you want to go. Baby steps toward God in his direction because the word of God says that he draws near to you when you draw near to him. 

It doesn’t say that he will draw near to you once you check all the things off your boxes. No, it doesn’t say that. All you have to do is take a step in his direction, big or small, and he’s going to take a step in your direction. 

How are you going to be able to know how you’re really doing when it comes to your spiritual growth? You are going to have to do an assessment. Don’t be afraid of the school test-sounding word. The only thing that you need to know about doing an assessment is that it’s going to allow you to take an honest look at the things that you did get done and the things that you didn’t get done. 

I promise you it’s not as bad as you think unless you are doing absolutely nothing. And I know that you’re not doing absolutely nothing because you’re reading this post. So unless you’re doing absolutely nothing, you’re not doing as bad as you think you are.

The goal of this assessment is not to judge you or make you feel bad. It’s not about shame. It is about just getting out of your head onto paper, what you have accomplished, and what you have not accomplished so that you can get a realistic picture of what’s going on. 

On a scale of one to five, one being, man, I blew it and five, meaning I killed it. Don’t overthink it. Don’t second-guess yourself. Don’t judge whatever your gut says right away, go with that. Rate yourself on the following questions:

  1. I have regular consistent time with God each day. 
  2. I look forward to my time with God. 
  3. I regularly read or study my Bible. 
  4. I have daily prayer time. 
  5. I believe God hears my prayers. 
  6. I attend regular in-person fellowship with other believers. 
  7.  I memorize scripture as part of my quiet time. 
  8. I observe a weekly Sabbath or time of rest. 
  9. I have a mentor or accountability partner that I contact regularly 
  10. I read books or listen to teachings on theology and spiritual growth. 

These 10 questions are meant to help you look at a high-level view of where you are in your spiritual growth. Again, don’t judge yourself. There is no judgment here. You either are, yes, I’m doing it, or no, I’m not. Try if you can take the emotion out of it because it’s going to help you get a more accurate view of where you’re at.

Once you have gone through this exercise, I want you to take some time and look at your fours and your fives. Where are the areas of your spiritual growth that you are killing it, that you are doing awesome, that you are completely satisfied with, and that you’ve been doing really well with? 

Look at those and celebrate them. Because even if you only have one, four or five, that means that there is an area that you’ve been consistent with that’s doing well for you. That is awesome. Great job. Don’t ignore that. 

Then I also want you to look at your ones and twos. Where are you struggling? Where do you have room for improvement, room for growth? And then for the rest of your time, I want you to think through these questions, and ask yourself why you answered the way that you did. 

If the question was, are you praying daily and you ranked that as a four, why are you doing so well with that? What is it specifically that you are doing that’s allowing you to be consistent with that thing? Or maybe you got to the one that says that you look forward to your time with God, and you had to say one, okay, why? 

What is it that you’re not doing? Or what are you not getting out of that time that’s leading you to rate this so low? Why are you dissatisfied? Why do you think that you’re not accomplishing what you want? Be honest with yourself here, but don’t judge yourself. No judging is allowed for this entire process. 

There is no judging, there is no shame, and there’s no condemnation. You’re not doing any of that because your goal here is to grow. Your goal here is to get a realistic picture of what’s going on so that you can make a plan that’s going to allow you to grow, take those steps forward, and see progress in your faith. 

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Improving your relationship with God is easier once you’ve taken time to evaluate your spiritual growth plans.



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